These days, there are so many instances that I can realize how I have let others (especially my dad) angry, disappointed and getting accustomed.

Maybe that's what I deserved.

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Afterall, I am an emotional person. Sometimes I 'd think something big such that I 'd feel energetic, but sometimes I 'd think something big such that I 'd feel bad.

Over these two days, I feel better maybe not because I 'd overcome the difficulty, but because I made some contact with friends that relieved me. Yesterday I went back to polyu to have lunch with some friends, and the day before I had lunch with my previous boss (and now I think we 're friends). It's a bit odd that even I didn't find ways to overcome the difficulty, I felt that I can overcome the difficulty.

Well the conclusion is, the job and the environment made me not having a chance to get relieved. I think more importantly, I couldn't talk freely with ppl in the current team, particularly with the project manager and my current boss. I think it doesn't matter whether I 'd like to talk or not, it matters that whether we match or not.

Frankly, the sense of belonging to this company is not so strong as before now.

Though I know I am working in a system related to the service provided by the company, it looks I am just working on this system while not knowing what's going on in this company.

Having the confidence / trust lost by others is really harsh.

Seems my boss lost the confidence on me. On the meeting yesterday, when it's my turn to report my progress, he looked inpatient to listen to me, just stopped me and then asked what I would do, like giving me a checklist of what I should do.

I think he didn't respect me, maybe because he thought I didn't respect my work before. Frankly, it's quite discouraging when your boss did this to you, but this did not make me giving up. I understand that I had to do much more to regain the trust of my boss. To do so, there's no other way than to focusing on my work.

Dunno what to write here these days...

It doesn't mean I dun have anything in my mind, but I thought something that I wanna write is nothing special, or it 's worthless to write here.

Frankly, busy in coaching in summer made me having little private time, not being able to concentrate on the job, not being able to take any opportunities.

Being bothered so much in summer, I 'd take sick leaves even being just a little bit sick (so little bit that I can even go to gym), so that I can really take a rest. To me, taking rest means I can take care my family business, buying stuff for home, fixing any failure at home (like the door bell I tried to fix today, though still not fixed).

Ai... I am not cheating my boss. Being annoyed is already unhealthy. Stopping for a while, will make me mentally healthy and energetic for the coming days.

今朝經過九龍公園個間mcdonald, 又見番個 manager. 好一段時間冇見佢，佢其實係我地03 去泰國時認識. 個時我覺得佢好似一個細路女, 但今日見到佢已經成熟左, 而且仲就來做人阿媽!

歲月不留人，冇人會等你．　

Back from japan.

a bit happy that I accomplished a goal that I set this year, that is to compete in this event in Single Scull. I ranked 27 among 55-56 competitors. I think it's quite good for me.

Became busy right after coming back. I knew I brought some trouble to my colleagues when I was away, even I tried my best to handle my own work beforehand. It really again doubt my own ability, and I think my boss would doubt my ability also.